12/9/09

There is a fucked up ceremony type thing where people come in and want to have this done. There are bizarre helmets made of wires that they put on their head which punctures them in the middle of the forehead. I am hired to do this procedure.

There is a series of rooms where this is done. They are in a row on a larger platform. Doors lead into the rooms down a hallway on one side and the other side has possibly curtains. I believe this other side of the room overlooks the rest of the hall. The scene has a goldish tint to it, lots of reds, oranges and browns. Things are dark, alot of shadows. The person showing me (male, long hair, dirtied t-shirt) tells me that the other people who also perform this procedure have specific rooms they like to chose but I am led to a random room since this is my first time (this has a similar feel to a tattoo parlour, with the individual rooms and preferences of the artist).

At first I'm not really sure what the procedure entails, but I have some idea. I'm nervous, unsure, disgusted.. I feel that what I am about to do is sadistic and dark. My first "customer" arrives (a female, dirty blond hair, frizzy, pulled back). I put the helmet on her. It is difficult for me to recall and describe the feeling at that moment, if she was scared or not. A hole is made into her forehead with the device, a clear puncture wound. I see that it is not so bad. I cannot remember if it hurts the person getting it done.

It seems to me that this whole need for the procedure is part of some larger plan. There is the sense of some sort of larger picture to all this, a possible leader. Things seem to fade out and I have no idea what happens after. I just remember feeling alot of turmoil when I am first brought to this room (it kind of feels like being in a SAW film, actually).

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do it!!